To celebrate World Poetry Day, three MHM staff have kindly shared poems they have written about their own experiences with mental health problems:

‘Recover Me’, by Louisa

Today I told myself that work would have to wait,
That I needed to hide myself away,
That there would be no way I could concentrate.

Today I told myself that all I had to do was to fake a smile,
But even then, all it could do was hold,
Those dark thoughts back for a little while.

Today I told myself that I was nothing but a failure,
That a world without me in it,
Would finally give them closure.

Today I told myself that I would make that call,
That it was okay for me to open up,
And say: “No. I’m not okay after all.”

Today they helped me change the way that I see,
Changed the lenses, refocused the light,
On myself and the world that surrounds me.

Today I finally did something I would once avoid doing.
I managed to hold my nerves but I could not believe,
That the strength in me had begun renewing.

Tomorrow may be a darker day and one I have to face,
But I don’t let that hold me back anymore; I finally see,
That bit by bit, everything else will fall into place,    
Because now I have the fight to recover me.

 

(Trigger warning: thoughts of suicide.) The next poem is by a member of staff in our Coventry team, who recovered many years ago – it is quite an emotional poem, but C wanted to put into words how she felt then:

Suicide, by C Jackson

Goodbye to all my dreams and farewell to my pain,
I no longer have to hurt and feel no hidden shame 

It has come to the time to speak out and be brave,
Of my yearning thoughts of being lowered to the grave

For a lifetime has passed and I’m riddled with anger;
of facing another day of being crushed, whilst surfacing a laughter

Plodding along on a hopeless journey,
hoping to be rescued, or another to own me 

I weep in silence of my failures in life
Why should I wake up? … Pretend to be standing with pride!

My soul will be dancing, whilst the body will lay,
Oh dear friends I will miss you, but truly powered for this day

I find no alternatives to see things any other way and it’s a liberating feeling to know this is my day!

 

Connections, by Helen

Me,
I’m a bit unique.
I, have a habit seeing things differently.
Not seeing people the way others see them.
Not seeing people as things…
As problems…
As complications, inconvenient.
As TROUBLE!!!!
I see people as having potential to change THINGS
That are: Complicated. Inconvenient and troublesome.
I see hope and possibilities.
I see potential
I see dreams
I see sorrow and loneliness that can be dispersed like a dandelion clock
Not by a pound in the tin cup
But, by a hello, a smile, a connection
By caring by sharing by giving a F….lippin moment of your time
To recognise,
That people are NOT things.